Everything you do is well thought-out, deliberate... Have you ever felt like just letting go... resting your mind, your soul? That is because I'm so confused. My mind weighs a ton, throbbing in every direction, trying to hold on to a semblance of normalcy. Though.... I'm failing miserably....

He maneuvered his way through the labyrinthine corridors, in search of a room that had been assigned to him by his college. It was dark and stuffy all around, and reeked of that 'laundry' smell that had seemed to settle itself into his every fibre. Students' hand-washed clothes hung like dead, stretched meat on sale at the night market at every available space. The smell was making his head throb.

When he finally reached his room, he pushed it open and was greeted by two Indian males. They acknowledged him with a mere nod and continued shoving things from a cardboard box into a wooden drawer that was provided. It then occurred to him that he had not brought anything at all. Not even the one thing that had seemed to matter the most before this. A sane mind...

He recalled something from a few days ago. He was stuck in a crowd of sweaty people, and some of those sweaty people waiting for the countdown to begin were his friends, except he suddenly found it hard to remember each and everyone of their names. Because they never mattered... and never would matter. An explosion of fireworks brightened up the dark sky, courting 'oohs' and 'aahs' from the eager crowd before it happened. The fireworks stopped abruptly. Everyone looked around in confusion, wondering what to feel about this when he plunged into a dreamlike state.

"WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!" a distant voice yelled.

It was in the dreamlike state that he saw two people running towards a green door nearby. Nobody in the crowd seemed to have noticed it, but by then, the crowd had already turned into useless mounds of meat before his eyes. Nothing else mattered then, except the two people who were running towards the door. He recognized one of them. Jacob, the quintessential cool guy that was in his class during secondary school, someone he'd tried to emulate during those years...

He ran in after them. A blinding blindness seemed to swallow the whole room up. The first thing he noticed in that brightly-lit room was the label, "Red Room", stuck atop another door. Jacob sat trembling at a desk, muttering, "I can't take this anymore... I can't......" He ignored Jacob and marched straight up towards a fat old lady sitting in the middle of the room.

"What place is this?" was his question.

"An institute for people inflicted by the Red Rose disease. These people believe in things they see in movies, and then succumb to insanity when triggered. Different people come with different triggers."

Funnily, he never saw the other guy that also ran into the room. His mind flashed back to the present and soon, he found himself muttering to himself, completely detached now from whatever was going on around him. Have you ever felt like letting go from this social aspect of your life? You just want to be alone, not for a while, but maybe forever... You don't want to act like you care. Well, that's because you really don't...

He stumbled out into the corridor and felt his way around with the walls. Where he was headed to, he wasn't really sure but one thing was certain, he had been in that place before. When he finally reached the door to his destination, an old lady approached him and said, "But you did not exhibit any signs of the disease!" He looked up at the label and finally broke down.

"Not where it appears, but where it matters."

Tee Pei Vin

Hey Guys! First and foremost, I would like to thank Dr. Raihanah for giving us a chance to share our ideas and opinions through this blog. Since this is my first posting, I am feeling lucky enough to be Malaysians and I have read Nur Hafizah’s posting on this song called “Here In My Home” by various Malaysian Artistes. I have a feeling that Malaysians are somehow bonded with a strong unity that only existed through harmonious nation. I am so proud that until now we are still one nation and will remain the same harmonious nation forever. Therefore, the lyrics in this song Malaysian Artistes For Unity (Here In My Home), connotes an extensive meanings of a Malaysian Nation. I didn’t copy the whole lyrics since it is too spacious, but here are parts of it.

Malaysian Artistes For Unity (Here In My Home)

Push back sister won't you push back?
Love won't wait, just keep pushing on
Yeah I'm strong, you ain't heavy
Oh don't you worry about that...
What we have shadows can't deny
Don't you know it's now or never?

(chorus)
Here in my home
I'll tell you what it's all about
There's just one hope, here in my heart
One love undivided
That's what it's all about
Please won't you fall in one by one?

(Malay)
Bertubi asakan berkurun lamanya
Hati ke depan mencari yang sayang
[Years of fears and years of tribulation
The heart keeps searching for that endless devotion]

(chinese)
Shou qian shou da jia yi qi zou, wo men dai biao guo ren kai kou wei lai jiu mei you diu zou
-[meaning: Hand in hand we'll march like blood brothers
I speak for my people, hope we'll find peace forever]

(tamil)
Inthe payanam payanamm yen vettri thaagam
Anthee kaana kaalam naam vetri raagam... nanba nanba
-[meaning: May the road ahead quench my thirst for success
May the road behind echo a song of the blessed]

(Bahasa Inggeris)
Yes I feel it in my bones, so I will let it be known
No matter where I roam this is home sweet home

There is something about the lyrics that makes me think that until now, we are able to stand up as One Malaysia. The chorus part refers Malaysia as “home” to all Malaysians and there is one hope that binds us together, that is to unite harmoniously. The other part of the song features language such as Malay, Chinese, Tamil, and English. After all, what language you speak, you will always be a proud Malaysian at heart.

AFIFAH HANANI YUSUF (A126294)

"will always be Malaysian at heart"

A choral-speaking script I wrote for my youngest sister's class.

"Honk!Honk!Pon!Pon!Vrooooom!"
That grating noise in your ears
What do you know?
It's so common on Malaysian roads
Everyone thinks it's their 'grandfather's road!
"No where got"
What NOOO?
Just look at the way they're driving!
Queue-jumping, cutting across the lane with no thought whatsoever
And those aren't even the worst!
Everyone is always rushing off to somewhere, somehow
In the bank, frowns of concentration on faces
Murmurs of "Aiyo, why so slow one ah?" all over the places
While heads be scratched, and you'll get to hear, "Excuse me?"
And those who jump queue, they look to the front with blank expression
Because you know what?
It's our practice! We're the only ones pressed for time!
And then when maneovering our cars out of parking spaces later,
We curse, curse and curse
"Oops! Did an illegal U-turn."
"Ah loi, see got police or not?"
One gains on the car, and she gets off scot-free
That's why you see these Formula 1 racers on the road every day
Where else in the world will you get to see a whole gang of them on the road swearing at each other?
Think that's cute? You haven't heard better ones!
You must have taken the KTM at least once(or everyday, in which case sigh) in your life
"Yeah, that never-on-time KTM"
And when it does come, boy, is there big drama when everyone tries to squeeze in at once
"Hey dumbnut let people go 1st la!" "Don't bang my face with your bag, stupid!"
Once inside, you see old ladies with heavy bags standing while the youngsters remain comfortably seated
Stop at the KL Sentra station, take the monorail to Bukit Bintang to enjoy a wonderful arrays of colors
"What colors? "
"Eh, you Malaysian ka? Din hear lalamui lalazai before meh?"
You accidentally lay your eyes on them even a second they'll say something about your mother
Uneducated bunch you think but leave them alone
Because do you know the average number of books a Malaysian read in one year is a meagre two(whisper)
Yes, two!
"Eh, don't talk so bad about us la. We got good things also what. KLCC leh?" "Where else you want to find so delicious punya nasi lemak? You think overseas got ah?"
"Got"
"Where got"
"KFC Combo leh"
"And don't forget you know, we can tahan other races, not like some countries."
" Talk so much, you don't love your country meh?"
We don't?
We say, MALAYSIA BOLEH!"

Regards,
Tee Pei Vin

These are a few snippets of what the modern generation of Malaysia is like. Some might be able to identify themselves withing some of the conversations and some might be aghast at the portrayal of some individuals. Of course, these portrayals are sort of universal as well... Nonetheless, it's a work of fiction (as well as written in an hour's time).

Youthful Days

"Movie? Or just loitering?" I asked through the phone while busy shuffling through my mails.
"Movie. The latest one, of course. We'll invite --- and --- as well," the reply.
"Okay. So... we'll meet up at the usual?" Oh. Another blasted spam mail. Delete.
"No, not this time. We're going to the newer cinema. It's bigger and more comfortable there."
"Okay. We'll buy the tickets when we meet up then? I have a student card." Hm... today's astrology seems good. Delete.
"Sure. Then I'll ask the others if they're free. Tell you the time later after I've confirmed it with them."
"Sure thing. Later then." Update notice, huh? It's not a series I'm familiar with anyways. Delete.
"Bye."
"Yeah, bye." Why do people forward these kind of chain letters? Idiots... Delete.

"Mom, I have to go now. I'm already late for the meeting with my friends." I told my mother as I rushed about my room picking up the essentials and stuffing them into my handbag.
"But you said the movie's at 2pm! There's 2 more hours to go!" my incredulous mother said as she stopped chopping up carrots and turned her head to face me.
"But it's Friday! There will be a traffic jam. Not to mention that we'll have to fight the schoolkids for tickets. It's the latest movie after all." I paused at the table and try to remember if I had packed everything I need into my bag.
"Alright, fine. Go, then. Remember to come back earlier, okay?" my mother replied in a defeated tone and went back to her chores.
"Sure. I'll get you something after the movies," I yelled as I grabbed the keys and ran out the front door to start the car.


"Do you know --- went to Germany for her studies?"
"Oooh.... so far? She must be really talented."
"Pfft. Talented? She's rich. Her parents can fork out the cash to let her soak there until she passes."
"Haha... yeah. She's not that bright back at school. Always taking the lower-half placing among the top ten."
"Wah. That's good, isn't it? I only get in the 10s."
"Haha... if you're bad, I'm worse. I get around the 20s."
"That's because you never revise for the exams. You're a genius to be able to get that kind of marks without studying."
"What genius? I would've gotten into UM if I'm as good as you say."
"Oh, this cake is delicious! The chocolate is so rich..."
"Yeah. I love this Tiramisu cake. And this cup of tea."
"Jasmine, right? It smells good even from here."
"Talking about jasmines, you heard about that girl who work in that flower shop?"
"Oh... ---, right? She's always switching jobs, isn't she?"
"Yeah, that's the one. You know, I hear she worked in a pub before, serving drinks!"
"Eww..... That's dirty."
"God knows what she's done in that kind of place..."
"Don't talk bad about her, she's a good girl. Doesn't even have a boyfriend--"
"No boyfriend equals a bad person. No boys must have wanted her because she's not pure anymore!"
"You don't know that... She was very quiet and obedient back in school..."
"Well, they say that quiet people are even more prone to doing unimaginable things..."
"That's not true! I'm quiet, too!"
"Well, you're not now."
"Hahahahaha"

Adulthood

"Why are you still coming back so often? You're already married into your husband's house. Go help you mother-in-law instead."
"But --- says I don't have to. I don't know how to cook anyways..."
"That is no excuse. Go help your mother-in-law cut up vegetables or do something simple. You don't necessarily need to cook."
"Ugh... Next time, mom. I'm already here anyways."
"Girls these days... Don't even know how to do a decent house chore... Back in my days, we--"


"My mother is complaining about you, you know... She's saying that you're not helping around, even during the festive celebrations. Even though mother doesn't look like it, she cares about these kind of things, too. Try to help out some, alright? I'm not asking you to cook and do laundry and all the house chores but at least help a little. Please? For me?"
"Oh, fine. If you put it that way... I thought you said your mother was modern-minded. Who does all these house chores nowadays, anyway? We have maids for a reason, you know."
"Ah, but we don't. Not us."
"Not yet, you mean. You do remember that you promise me a maid when I give birth to our first child, right? I expect you to keep that promise. Or else, I'll really divorce you..."
"Come on, dear... Don't say such things... I promise I'll get a maid when you get pregnant, alright? Now don't sulk and smile for me, dear."


"You promised me a maid when I get pregnant! Now our child is five and yet, where's the maid? You said the economy was bad when I gave birth and I agreed to wait a couple of months, then it became a year and now, five years down the road and yet no maid!"
"You know we can't afford one right now... The government is introducing all these new plans on hired help and frankly, it's more hassle than help..."
"But you promised! You said I don't need to do all the house work and that we'll share the tasks. You said you'll cook for us. You said you'll bring me to Paris for our third honeymoon. You said--"
"I know, I know. But you also know I can't now, right dear? The economy's bad and now that you're not working--"
"Oh. Now it's my fault, is it? I told you I wanted to go back to my old company after my maternity rest but no, you told me to rest longer and take care of the child until he became more manageable. Then, you told me that this place we shifted to is too far from my old company and that you'll find me a job in your company. Then you told me that the boss's relative got the post and now you're blaming me for not working?!"
"Dear, calm down. I never blamed you for anything! I was just saying that our income now is not as much as it used to be and--"
"Enough of your excuses! You always said that you're tired after coming back from work and that you'll do the laundry the next morning before you leave for the company but you always forget! And I'll be the one to do the laundry. Then, you tell me you're too tired to cook after work and that you'll cook the next day. Now our kitchen is covered with a layer of dust! If it were not for me boiling herbal soup every now and then, the stove would've been non-operational by now!"
"Dear... You must understand that working in a multinational company is stressful. All the quotas and meetings and stuff... it's all so tiring. And the lady boss is always nagging me to do this and that and my subordinates are too clueless to be of much help..."
"I did all that and yet am still able to perform house chores back then! If I can manage taking care of the child, cleaning the house, doing the laundry after work, why can't you?"
"It's not as simple as you think. You're only an assistant back then, I'm a manager. My job's burden is much more compared to yours."
"Oh, now you're saying my job is easier, huh? Why don't you try doing accounts all day, morning to night non-stop? Try walking from the 11th floor to the ground floor carrying a stack of papers just because the lift is crowded and that you're supposed to hand it to the head five minutes ago? In high heels, no less!"
"That's enough! I don't want to talk about this anymore. I'm already stressed out after work, I don't need this when I get back home..."
"What? And now it's my fault? You're the one who's incapable of taking care of this family. You're the one who cannot stand the pressure. You're a lousy breadwinner, that's what. All the other husbands are all CEOs and Chairmans and all, and their wives can shop all they want all day while I have to slave about at home doing menial tasks and get looked down by my useless husband when he comes home from work. Is this how you repay me for all that I've done for the family? If this is the treatment I get, I want a divorce!"
"Don't wave that word around so carelessly. It's not a toy you can play with and then discard whenever you like."
"I'm not toying around with you. I want a divorce! You've not only wasted my efforts all these years, you've even wasted my youth! I could have chosen that sweet guy who gave me deer meat weekly or that guy who's a boss of a car-repairing company but I chose you instead! An average, good-for-nothing unambitious loser!"
"That's it! If it's a divorce you want, it's a divorce you'll get!"
"Fine!"

Note: "---" refers to a person's name. I'm leaving it blank since I'm uncreative in the naming department.

Wrote these during my Form 6 days... The second piece won first prize in the school essay-writing competition. :D

Malaysia - The Nation Through Our Years

I woke up with a start, as an all-too-familar shrill ringing pierced the silence of the morning. Groaning, I turned off the alarm, trying to rub the sleep out of my eyes at the same time. It was Friday morning, but for some reason, I wasn't experiencing the elation Friday mornings always brought with them. A sullen mood prevailed as I went about my daily morning rituals.

"You look so down today," a Malay classmate known for her gregarious ways asked in a concerned manner. I shrugged, as if the problem pressing down on my chest could be shrugged off as several other classmate started surrounding me. To my horror, a solitary tear streamed down my face. It wasn't unexpected, as I'd been bottling them up for some time now. "It just had to happen right here huh?" I thought bitterly as sobs started racking my body. It was a rhetorical question, as I knew exactly the reason. The source of all this depression was coming home today....

Not even aware of what was happening anymore, I experienced a temporary flashback amidst the worry-wrought voices of my classmates. "Merdeka today lah, don't be so sad....." The voice sounded like it came from far away.

The canteen was teeming with students, either jostling with the others for seats or queuing up for their food. I had just finished devouring a packet of my perennial favourite, nasi lemak and quickly scrambled out of my seat. Having informed my friends of my early departure, I virtually dashed all the way to the public phone located outside the staffroom and slipped a 50 cent coin into the slot. I dialled home. My grandma picked up the phone in the middle of the second ring. I cut in before she could say anything, "Nikki got the scholarship mah?" My heart pounded to a point where I thought it'd actually burst through my ribcage.

"Yeah lah, she got it! And country is India!" She went on blabbing about how people said India was a good place for medical students but I'd tuned out. I was gripped by a sudden palpable sense of loss. So, my younger sister from whom I'd never been apart for more than a week was going to leave for India after doing her Cambridge A-levels in a college in Sepang for a year and a half . To study medicine. Reality sank in. She was only coming back every Friday, and only on weekends would I get to revel in her company...

The years in which Nikki and I grew up together spanned three states. We were both born in Johor, or to be more exact, Tangkak, to a sales executive and a housewife in their mid- twenties. Our early childhood was riddled with trips to our maternal grandfather's durian orchard. That aside, it was what everyone would call a typical childhood. We argued a lot, yes, but those childish arguments were far outnumbered by the happy times we had spent with each other. It was during those years we learned the pleasure of friendship, as a strong sense of camaraderie always dominated in the kampong that was Tangkak, our hometown up to this very day. The fact we lived between the Malays and the Indians also helped. Hence, the existence of a real melting pot for cultures smack bang in the middle of the proverbial nowhere, in Malaysia.

I recall a certain event still very much vivid in my mind. It happened at night, on the 31st of August in the year 1994. The seven of us (Nikki, I and the others, the walking definition of the phrase racial harmony) were playing like monkeys(in my father's words) in front of our house that night, drenched in sweat. We were chasing each other around, after getting bored of singeing the grass around us with matches under the watchful eyes of our parents, as they chatted with the neighbours in broken Malay. Then, the first fireworks exploded in the sky. We stopped running around to look up at the sky, now pinpricked with a myriad of colours. A second round of fireworks burst into the sky like flora blooming in the spring and we found ourselves cheering and screaming at the sudden burst of colours that surrounded us. "Hari ni Hari Merdeka!" Siti, the youngest of us all yelled. And we stood, transfixed by the beauty of it all. The typical children of Malaysia, abdicated of all responsiblities, standing under the night sky on a very special day to the nation as a whole.

All good things come to an end, however as our parents dropped us a bombshell in the beginning of the year 1996 by announcing we would be moving to Melaka, due to the nature of our father's job. An ominous atmosphere presided as Nikki and I spilled out hearts' contents about the move to each other. That year, we celebrated Merdeka Day without the flare we were used to. The few years after were then spent on navigating the historical waters of Melaka, and we came to love Melaka, especially the Portuguese settlement by the seaside. How can I ever forget how pleasant the breeze ruffling our hair was, whenever we were having yet another evening meal in an open-air seafood restaurant there? And the white tourists! It was quite an experience for Nikki and me as we hadn't seen many whites during our years in Johor.

The years went by in a blur and we moved to Kuala Lumpur in the year 2000. Howdy, city life! How easy was it to fit in and learn the ways of the city people, having been tainted by the progress of a nation, slowly forgetting our roots and identity. Fast forward to the year 2007, I felt like I was on the outside, looking in, when Nikki and I were sitting in the mamak stall near our house, sipping our glasses of iced Milo. It was the night after my embarrassing crying fest at school. The mamak stall was practically alive with the sounds of the Malays, Indians and the Chinese. "Ah ne! Satu milo ais!" "Dua nasi lemak!" "Mari kira!"

"You have no idea how much I've missed home, Jie," Nikki said, leaning forward. "But I have to go to India in two more years, I'm really scared!" Trust me, I knew how scared she was, judging by the expression on her face when she signed the contract with 'Kerajaan Malaysia' a few weeks ago for the scholarship. I responded jokingly, "Take it easy, sis. You're doing us proud. You're doing Malaysia proud." She went on, "But you have no idea! Imagine, it's India for five years! Oh I'm going to miss Malaysia so much. You're really lucky, you know?" At that moment, a spectacular array of fireworks exploded in the sky. The people around us started letting out deafening yells of "MERDEKA!" but funnily, my mind wasn't on it. I was too busy looking up at the fireworks display and for a fleeting second, I swore I saw us up there. The childhood 'gang', the melting pot for cultures, there it was, a picture of brilliance in the sky. It was truly a magical moment. Nikki jolted me out of it by screaming to be heard above the ruckus, "Here's to the nation's fiftieth birthday!" And we clinked glasses.

The Joys Of Merdeka

It is really just another one of those days you feel on top of the world, as you jabber away with your friends at a mamak stall, sipping from a glass of iced milo. Kneaded in the scene is the proverbial people from all walks of life, all with their own color and stories to tell. Tales of daily gaffes and troubles invade the air. They are the typical anak Malaysia, all united under the palings of living in Malaysia and the things brought with it. And it is at that particular mamak stall they revel in the true sense of the word merdeka.

Your shopping blast in KLCC is coming to an end, as you've just been bombarded by calls from your parents warning you about that accursed curfew. Hotfooting it out of KLCC laden with shopping bags and bugged by painful heels, you reach the LRT station with your friends and it is during the time spent on waiting for the train to reach you all bemoan(not too softly) the crawling slowness and general inefficiency of the nation's public transport system. The train I am in finally reaches and they come in, still talking. Brimming with passengers keen on getting home apace, the train moves and whizzes past the lights of the city. Have we failed to notice the beauty, and that more than half of the world's population have never enjoyed this kind of basic contentment in their whole life? Yes, we are merdeka, we just failed to see it.

Moving along, it is also merely another typical day for me, who has just completed another day of my Form 6 life in school, and is now typing in front of the computer screen, trying to finish up an essay to submit for a school contest. I ponder a little on the fact that I have too, like all Malaysians, condemned the nation's shortcomings, but hey, I love Malaysia with all my heart, warts and all. Those are what make it so Malaysian! And I'm merdeka, be it the imminent end of STPM or for the others, year-end examinations, we're MERDEKA!

A happy 50th birthday to you, my beloved nation!

Regards,
Tee Pei Vin

Dear Friends,

Hi to all my friend,,

This is my first post in our Malaysia In Narration blog. I have read Dr. Raihanah's email today. She was give a suggestion about Malaysia singer/band to promote Malaysia. This make me remember the various artist from Malaysia. It also known Malaysia Artist for Unity. In this song, all Malaysian popular singer, sing the song together without show any different races, culture, language and religion.
This song was publish on May 2008. It produce by a group of 120 people without any budget. That mean, this song was produce to Malaysian people hear and think that we are Malaysian people without show any differences. We give our love for our beautiful country, Malaysia. We also communicate in any language with different people. We have our national language, Bahasa Malaysia that can close us to other people in they own culture. I think this song is suitable for 1Malaysia as our Prime Minister mention it before.
In this song, I like the rap part. The singer use Malay, Chinese and Tamil language. It really show us, that Malaysia have many people from different culture, religion and so on, together in one unity.
Before I stop writing and go to bed, here i give the url for the song. Listen it and enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8Wl3firJQk

Noor Hafizzah Osman
A125576

It’s your biggie Day,

But I couldn't do anything, you were here but in someway,

You didn’t care,

I can't feel your existence and I couldn’t stay.
Your words brought me tears and it won’t fade away.

There are no you for me since u will never found me.
And I am gone, yet still you just let it be .

mohd hafiszudin mohd amin

0935pm, father's day.

Check out these two songs by Malaysian performers.

The first, by TooPhat and Yasin, contains elements of hybridization through the marriage of Arabic and English. A wonderful hybrid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uP6ASQcUqdE&feature=related

And the second, by PointBlanc, contains vivid representation of nativization of English through the domestication of context (e.g. the town of Ipoh) and Malaysianisms.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhMlDLb5U1E

Enjoy.

MiN Team.

This blog is dedicated to all narrations connected to the nation-state of Malaysia. From songs, to films, adverstisments to literature, anything that is written by Malaysians, for Malaysians, on Malaysia will be showcased here.

To begin with, the discussion will focus primarily on texts (literary and non-literary) written in English.

We hope you have a wonderful time reading and sharing your thoughts about Malaysia.